Not too long ago, in a galaxy not so far away, I came to a dark and lonely place.
A place where the angry, negative, self-doubting voice in my head was nearly successful in making me forget that there were things in life worth living for. That shame-laden, guilt-ridden questioning voice echoed in my ear for weeks, months even. It asked, no…more like demanded: “When is it going to be enough? When are you going to feel like you are enough?”
And while I struggled inside to regain some semblance of control over that threatening voice, most people likely had no clue that I was anything but what I appeared to be on the outside: a proud member of the Canadian Armed Forces (CAF), a volunteer within my community, a busy mother of two young girls, and a loving partner to one of the smartest, funniest men I know.
What they likely did not see is how I used being busy to distract myself from what I was feeling inside: the growth of an unfathomable void in the pit of my being.
But—despite the lies I tried to tell myself—my husband, my children, and my closest co-workers knew that something was off.
They were the first to ask me: “Are you okay?” “How are you doing today?” They were the first to express their willingness to listen: “I am here if you need someone to talk to.” “Want to go somewhere quiet to talk?”
And they were the first to step up and connect me with the help I needed when I finally gave up pretending that everything was fine: “I think the…
Continue Reading This Article At The Canadian Armed Forces Website
